Q&A

**Yes, below the lower clouds in the sunset shot is a harbor. Is that why the colors are so vivid??

**What does the job entail when the ship's gone? We're in the process of building the communications department. There haven't been enough staff to cover communications separately (Poor Joanne's had two full-time jobs and the Teams job is the more urgent of the two). Also, I'm going to be writing and designing the Making Waves magazine - that's a 3-4/yearly issue - so that's going to keep me busy too. There's (hopefully) going to be a lot of presentations in schools and churches about Marine Reach and what we do. We're also hoping to get some airtime on the radio.

**Why did Joshua's birth certificate come after his death certificate? Will we get a new one? Why does it say deceased if he's been born alive?

His death certificate paperwork went through really quickly because it was handled by the funeral director (who obviously knows the paperwork/routine well). His birth certificate was never sorted out because I'm not familiar with NZ birth certificates and protocol. In the US I just signed some stuff at the hospital and went to pick up the certificate the next week (unusual because we needed it for her passport - it would have just come in the mail).
So when it became clear he'd be sticking around I called my midwife about the paperwork (lived an hour away) and she said to ask for it at the local birthing centre. So Matt went up and got a receptionist who was unfamiliar with it and gave him one page. We filled that out and sent it in with a cheque for the paper copy (apparenty you have to pay for them here). Several weeks later they sent us a letter saying we "had failed to register his birth". HUH? So we called and they said it wasn't the right paperwork - and then sent us the right stuff. So we finally got that and sent it back. After Joshua had died, I still hadn't seen it in the mail and called to ask. I got someone who asked me "Is it urgent?" (as in, do we need to hurry to send this to you?) and I said, "Yeah, well he died. So I just want this over with. Two days later it was in my mailbox. Reading "deceased". It says deceased because it was issued after his death. Legally it's gotta say that. Otherwise someone could falsely apply for stuff with his birth certificate. It's frustrating that it took him dying to get them to move fast. Oh the wonders of government...


On another note. It's getting difficult to see pregnant women, baby clothes, new babies, and his pictures everywhere. I keep imaging how I held him - with his cele in my right hand and his body supported by my forearm and elbow - his feet dangling. A few of his sleepers still smell like him. I'm trying not to smell them heaps - but I know that eventually they'll lose the smell too...
I have the dresser by my bed decorated with his things - his ceramic teddy bear (with his ashes), his blanket (that he was in when he passed away), his bright blanket he always had, the "Be strong and courageous" poster on the bouquet my parents bought, his birth certificate in it's BC holder. Shrine? Hmm. No. Memorial stand. Probably. I'd probably have done something similar if he had a grave to visit. But instead it's beside my bed. I just keep getting an overwhelming memory that "I'm never going to hold him again." Oh God.