We're all fine! Don't worry! I know I've been MIA for 48 hours - my apologies. Wednesday was spent cleaning all day - my parents house had a showing and it was ... uh ... pig sty material.
Thursday morning we left very early for Tauranga. Heather came and changed Joshua's bandages and the antiobitic cream seems to have worked GREAT! This is fantastic because his doctors don't want him on continuous antibiotics, because eventually he'll become immune to them. We went down for my first big meeting for communications with Marine Reach Ministries. There's a big send off for the ship on the 5th of April, and I'm "in charge" (how terrifying) of the event. So there's a lot to do. Anyways, we were planning to go down, have one meeting, go out and look at houses, come back for a 2nd meeting, and then go home. Instead...
Matt had his meeting and I had my first. Then we went out looking for houses... I thought this whole renting houses thing was easier. So after a lot of frustration and a bunch of phone calls two days later - we've not looked at a single house. And we don't even have one full application put in... pieces of one and a bunch more sitting in a box in my kitchen. I was frustrated and gave up... what can I say?
We stayed the night at a friend's place - Joshua's adopted great grandparents - Ben and Helen A.
He's one of the old ship captains from way back... he's so wonderful and Helen is just a delight to be with. Helen and Ben had a daughter - Jenny - who caught meningitis as a baby. She was misdiagnoses for several days and by the time it was diagnosed, the damage was already done. Jenny was never "normal" after that and developed hydrocephalus. She lived for 5 years (she died as a result of having her teeth pulled ... not because of her condition). Helen has a soft spot for Joshua because of Jenny - and she loved holding him and talking to him. It was wonderful to stand in her living room and see pictures of Jenny (45 yr old pictures) ... she was a beautiful little girl. It's wonderful to see that 45 years down the track Helen and Ben still love their little girl so much, and she's forever one of their six children... certainly not forgotten. It's a good thing to see. Now I don't ever have to feel that I have to forget Joshua or feel less upset or feel less empty... he's my baby, he'll always be my baby ....
I saw a boy with his mom in a store today. He was probably 13 or 14, and was (some sort of) mentally disabled. And all I could do was smile... because I knew his momma loved him SOOO much! I could see it by the way she was letting him help her carry something, and she was smiling. It made me really happy to be out and about with Joshua.
But in that same store (not 5 minutes later) I saw a teenage girl look at me funny. I chalked it up to Joshua being in his sling (his head looks strange in the sling) and ignored it. Just a few minutes later I saw her walk up to her mother and whisper and point. Then they stood there and stared at us. And my mind ran a hundred miles an hour.
*Is she confused about why there's a lump behind his head (you couldn't see it when he was in the sling, just that there's a lump)?
*Is she confused about how small his head is and how it slopes back differently?
*Does she think I hurt him?
I go stuck on "Does she think I hurt him." And I got scared. What if people thought I did something to him? What if people don't get it and assume that? But at the same time I didn't want anyone to come talk to me about it.
I was walking around aimlessly - totally absorbed by these thoughts - when another young girl (sales rep from the store) looked up at me. I thought she MUST be thinking the same stuff, and got more depressed. A few steps later I heard, "Excuse me, ma'am?"
And she asked me, "Where do you get those sling things?" Haha. Here I am totally FLIPPING OUT and this girl's impressed by my handmade peanut pouch. I'm so panicky. I should laugh at myself. I explained that I made it and then walked away ........ smiling.
Joshua's been making noise today - sort of "talking". It's not quite gurgles and cooing, but it's as close as we've been. He's such a good sport - he was in and out of his carseat all day.
He goes for another weigh in on Monday. (That'll be Sunday evening EST)