Monday, September 13, 2010

Stunted Blogging

One of my nearest and dearest New Zealand friends - Cora - Mummy to some princesses that have shown their faces here before, having tea parties.

Over the last ... I don't know ... 6 months? My blog's become severely neglected. And not because I don't enjoy blogging. I think it's a combination of two things:

a/ I stopped seeing things through a camera lens.
The apartment we moved to in February was hideous for indoor photos. It was like a dungeon (basement apartment built into the base of a hill), so there was never enough light for a good shot, or even a half-bad shot. I also think I made the move to full-manual too quickly, because I'm looking back at my shots from a year ago when I was shooting aperture-priority and those all look better. (I also sold my PSE8 because we switched operating systems, so my drive to edit well was gone...). Because I didn't have anything good "in my camera", I had no motivation to share it. And when I did share photos, I felt they were just hideous snap shots and a far cry from what I knew I was capable of.

b/ I stopped being honest.
Not to say that I've been lying on this blog --- because that's just not me. But I have stopped saying *everything* on this blog. I used to love saying everything, but then life got hard (this year in particular) and I didn't want to advertise that to the world.
I didn't talk about our Dungeon Apartment, because I didn't want to complain. But in reality, it was extremely difficult. My washer was leaking with every wash, there were spiders throughout my house, the wiring to the girl's bedroom didn't work (so we only had a small desk lamp for the whole room). It was cement block and damp ... so laundry never dried inside. There was no fence in the yard, so I couldn't let the girls play outside unless I stood there with them (I had a guy who was building a house down the road return Naomi to me because she was standing in the middle of the road when he drove through [!!!!] ).
I didn't have friends over for a long time, because I didn't want people to see how crazy our living arrangements were. I had a two burner cook top with an "oven" that only fit a 9x13 pan in it - if I had anything bigger I had to use the over upstairs in the office space that wasn't ours.
I posted a few pictures of the apartment over time, but like I said, I didn't want to complain.

I'm not trying to complain now -- I just feel like I'm coming out from behind my curtain -- I want to get back to blogging the way I used to. I love it! I feel like I've been disconnected from a good friend. :) *Here's hoping I'm "back"*.


  1. Hugs to you friend... you have been missed! So sorry you been having a hard time... Keep smiling!

  2. I love your transparency with sharing why you haven't been bloggin' as much as you used to. I understand that sometimes we just need to step away and then come back when you are able. I love your blogging, so I hope that it does work out for you too to return :)!

    I understand that manual mode can be somewhat difficult to capture all the shots, especially when we are chasing our children. I decided a while a go that using the P setting on my camera was just going to have to do until I was no longer chasing my kids around and could choose the perfect scenarios to accomplish great shots. Indeed I can use the full manual mode, but I have decided that choosing my focal point and my ISO is plenty of manual adjustments to warrant a good photographer. In fact just the other day I read a blog by a professional photographer that said that he uses manual mode a lot, but for the most part, he actually leaves his camera in P mode for the same reasons that I had come to the conclusion. I was relieved because I wanted to focus on my composition for a while before really focusing on the other things and it really made this process so much more liberating.

    Anyway, I know I don't post often, but I wanted to encourage you to be free about it and have fun!

  3. ((hugs)) I love the way u write. So sorry it's been a rough year. I hope this time will be restorative for you.

  4. Nice to see you back online Susie and glad that you are safe and sound back in the US.


  5. Looking forward to more of your sharing!

  6. Can't wait to hear from you more often. I've missed you! (of course, I've "seen" you on FB, but I miss reading your blog, too!)

  7. I have been reading your blog for a long time and have always enjoyed your updates. I am happy to hear that you plan to come back to blogging *more.* :)

  8. You poor thing - believe me, I understand -but your situation sounds much worse than our mouse-infested trailer! The things we withstand for the privilege of ministry, right? :)

  9. I can certainly empathize with you about living in a non-functional house especially when you've got 2 kids to take care of. I hope things continue to get better for you and your family, and life rolls along more smoothly.