It's probably the best way to describe me lately. Discombobulated: "Thrown into a state of confusion". Oh yeah, that's me right now. To a T. It reaches far beyond the normal disengaged hormone-brain every new momma discovers.
There's so much to adjust to with having a new little one in the house. But add in that she's not my first, so I still have Oceana to tend to. And add that she's not my second, so I'm still dealing with missing Joshua in a big way. In fact, since Naomi's been born, I've found myself thinking more about him. I feel myself in a state of turmoil most days trying to balance caring for Oceana and for Naomi - and I begin to wish that I was balancing a tri-chaos, not a bi-chaos.
Ther'es all the paperwork involved in having a baby overseas. She needs a registration of birth abroad, a social security number, a passport, a visa, a permit, .... Egads! Do you understand how much paperwork that is? Do you understand how difficult it is to organise paperwork when you've got Momma-Hormone-Affected-Brain-Disorder? But I'm not diving for sympathy here. I'm just sharing a bit of why I feel the way I do.
See, there's a lot of work to do. Laundry is always a job and a half in a house with children. But it becomes especially interesting (insert maniacal laugh here) when you're trying to figure out what food it is that bothers your new little one's tummy. Because see, puke isn not a fluid that you can just ignore. Oh no. It must be mopped, soaked, or cleaned up. Then the items affected must be washed. And then there's all the things that are normally in the laundry... It becomes a full time job. And then there's the rain to deal with. And the lack of a dryer. Not that I'm complaining about the dryer. But it's always an adventure doing laundry in a semi-tropical country that loves its rain!
Besides laundry, there's the three year old who makes messes, pours water on the floor, spills food on the carpet, pees on the floor (in response to being the non-only-child anymore), and acts up for the sake of it.
There's food to be made, people to feed, dishes to wash, floors to keep clean.
There's a job that hasn't completely gone away during maternity leave.
And then there's that camera that I love, but that I haven't touched in days. Days and days of undocumented Naomi-ness. What am I doing here?
I want to blog. But I am dealing with so many other things, working to keep things sorted out in our home, that I can't think clearly enough to blog. And I HATE that. I love to blog. But it's just not happening right now. I hope I get back to blogging normally soon.
Love ya blogosphere! I'm trying to get back into my blogging routine. It makes me feel normal!