Tuesday, May 5, 2009


It's probably the best way to describe me lately. Discombobulated: "Thrown into a state of confusion". Oh yeah, that's me right now. To a T. It reaches far beyond the normal disengaged hormone-brain every new momma discovers.

There's so much to adjust to with having a new little one in the house. But add in that she's not my first, so I still have Oceana to tend to. And add that she's not my second, so I'm still dealing with missing Joshua in a big way. In fact, since Naomi's been born, I've found myself thinking more about him. I feel myself in a state of turmoil most days trying to balance caring for Oceana and for Naomi - and I begin to wish that I was balancing a tri-chaos, not a bi-chaos.

Ther'es all the paperwork involved in having a baby overseas. She needs a registration of birth abroad, a social security number, a passport, a visa, a permit, .... Egads! Do you understand how much paperwork that is? Do you understand how difficult it is to organise paperwork when you've got Momma-Hormone-Affected-Brain-Disorder? But I'm not diving for sympathy here. I'm just sharing a bit of why I feel the way I do.

See, there's a lot of work to do. Laundry is always a job and a half in a house with children. But it becomes especially interesting (insert maniacal laugh here) when you're trying to figure out what food it is that bothers your new little one's tummy. Because see, puke isn not a fluid that you can just ignore. Oh no. It must be mopped, soaked, or cleaned up. Then the items affected must be washed. And then there's all the things that are normally in the laundry... It becomes a full time job. And then there's the rain to deal with. And the lack of a dryer. Not that I'm complaining about the dryer. But it's always an adventure doing laundry in a semi-tropical country that loves its rain!

Besides laundry, there's the three year old who makes messes, pours water on the floor, spills food on the carpet, pees on the floor (in response to being the non-only-child anymore), and acts up for the sake of it.

There's food to be made, people to feed, dishes to wash, floors to keep clean.

There's a job that hasn't completely gone away during maternity leave.

And then there's that camera that I love, but that I haven't touched in days. Days and days of undocumented Naomi-ness. What am I doing here?

I want to blog. But I am dealing with so many other things, working to keep things sorted out in our home, that I can't think clearly enough to blog. And I HATE that. I love to blog. But it's just not happening right now. I hope I get back to blogging normally soon.

Love ya blogosphere! I'm trying to get back into my blogging routine. It makes me feel normal!


  1. Oh Susie, take your time. We all understand the new momminess and the chaos that comes with it. I'm sure I would have lost my head by now, you're doing great!!

  2. Hang in there, Susie! It's ALOT to adjust to. Anytime a-whole-nother needy person is added it just kinda throws everything into CHAOS! It's wonderful & so hard all at the same time. I'm thinking about you & will be praying for you. Just remember that what doesn't get done today will get done eventually!!!!
    Emily in Mississippi

  3. I hope you get back to blogging again soon too... we miss your Susieism's..(new word I made it up just now). We all miss seeing Miss Oceana and hearing of her antics, I know we are missing out on cute Naomi, Won't be long and she will be giving Oceana a hand in the mischief.
    I have one word of wisdom for you..... are you ready...
    Have a wonderful day, Enjoy your beautiful family.

  4. You've got a lot going on right now! I remember after I had Eliza, I felt like life really kicked me right in the rear... it was all I could do to keep my head above water.

    I can't understand everything that you have swirling around in your heart but I can pray that God will provide everything you need, moment to moment. Because sometimes, that's how we have to live :)

    Love ya!


  5. YOU will get back to normal Susie.

    I promise.

    Give yourself time. To think. To enjoy. To recuperate. To let your hormones balance.

    Housework can wait... enjoy life.

    Some houses try to hide the fact
    that children shelter there.
    Ours boasts of it quite openly,
    the signs are everywhere.
    For smears are on the windows,
    little smudges on the doors,
    I should apologize, I guess,
    for toys strewn on the floor.
    But I sat down with the children
    and we played and laughed and read;
    And if the doorbell doesn't shine,
    their eyes will shine instead.
    For when at times I'm forced to choose the one job or the other;
    I like to be a housewife but
    I love to be a mother.


  6. This is another poem... I think the one I was looking for.

    Song for a Fifth [or third] Child
    by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton

    Mother, oh Mother, come shake out your cloth,
    Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
    Hang out the washing and butter the bread,
    Sew on a button and make up a bed.
    Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
    She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.
    Oh, I’ve grown shiftless as Little Boy Blue
    (Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).
    Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
    (Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo).
    The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
    And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo
    But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
    Look! Aren’t her eyes the most wonderful hue?
    (Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).

    The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,
    For children grow up, as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
    So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.
    I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.

    [Ladies Home Journal 1938]

  7. Hang in there girl! Is there anyone that can come and help out? Either with Oceana (i.e. take her to the park, play with her, feed her) or with laundry? If I was there I'd offer to come over and pick up your laundry for you...at least to dry it if you had already washed it. If someone does offer a hand, PLEASE take them up on it. Don't be afraid to give them a job to do :) I always felt like I had to be super mom and do everything myself...I wish I ahd knkow better!

  8. thanks for posting your thoughts. i know we barely have met in the past, but i want to just fly over there, camp out in the backyard + help you with these day to day tasks that become so frustrating when you have two little ones to care for. i have many close friends going through the same stuff right now. i wish i could hop around, visiting everyone of them, offering some help so you mommies can get some rest + peace of mind. so.. i hope someone can stop by frequently to help you. and please KNOW the truth. that you are normal for feeling the way you do. it's a tough job.

  9. I feel for you Susie!! I'll be praying for you. I don't care what anyone says, being a mommy is THE single most difficult job on the planet. Being a wife runs a C-L-O-S-E second.

  10. mmm...wouldnt it be great to have a robotic helper of some kind? someone to help clean, etc so you can spend your time with the two girls...and so you can have time sharing thier brother's life with them? Oh how I wish laundry would do itself...and housekeeping? well I just wish that would do its own job too....
    oh the days that wouldnt seem so wasted if the innanimate objects would work like they do in cartoons...
    would be nice...VERY nice,...

  11. It's ok Susie. Deep breaths...I am there. I have my sister here and she is a huge help, but no one can clean like I can, no one can do the laundry as fast as me...so I am finding myself pushing it and pushing it to sheer exhaustion!! Careful :-) I know where you are at in terms of learning to balance 2 kids, and household work. I have been praying for you in terms of Joshua. Seeing my own baby has brought up Joshua in my mind and I have prayed quite a bit for you. I love you. You can do this!

  12. I hear you about not being able to get showers in with small children. I have 3 kids, 1 toddler, 2 school age. They keep me very busy with many dishes and much laundry and grimy hands and faces.
    Laurie in Washington

  13. You know what I find the worst thing about all of this - it is a 24/7 job that is UNPAID mmmmmm yes I have a few issues regarding this. The powers that be would rather we dropped our little darlings at daycare for someone else to look after so we can go out to work. Our job at home is the best in the world.
    ANYWAY - on that note I will go and sort my little darling out, find my floor, find my kitchen bench, clean the little room in the house & make the place respectable for g'ma and g'dad coming to stay tonight so we can go out to a parenting seminar!! Whew, I'm tired already!!!
    Praying you can juggle everything and find time to sleep :) Big kisses to your little darlings from me xxxx and a hug for you!!oooo

  14. miss you while your "away" but totally understand!!!

    Hope you find a new routine soon!!!

    I can only imagine the emotions that must come up for you with joshua as you care for sweet naomi. Praying your heart will settle into those conflicting emotions.

  15. Found your blog from American Mum's . . . discombobulated is one of my favorite words. and it often describes me :-)

  16. I've been wondering how y'all are doing. Just poke your head in over here when ya can. We're not going anywhere. :)

  17. We miss you Susie! But we understand why you have been MIA. Adjusting to a new baby is always hard. And heck I have a hard time keeping up with Laundry and I have a dryer and live in a semi dry climate! LOL! More power to ya! Just keep at it. It does get easier and your new "normal" will eventually appear!

    Spokane Valley, WA