Often I feel I have been criticized, or put down, and instead of standing up for myself I take the lowest of roads and stay quiet. Or worse, agree with the person.
But today as I was laying in bed thinking about my day, I decided I wasn't going to do that. Last night while at a church meeting for everyone at work, Oceana was starting to get rowdy. She's the only kid there, so there's not childcare. Near the end I had to take her to the bathroom twice after (LOUD) announcements that she needed to use the toilet. I ended up playing in the back of the room with her - throwing a tennis ball back and forth, lifting her on and off of tall stacks of chairs, and generally aiding and abetting. :)
It suddenly occurred to me that instead of complaining about "missing out" or being "stuck" in the back - I was going to enjoy this! She's my blessing! She's my baby! I love her to pieces1 I get to be her Momma! This is my privilege! I came home from the meeting feeling really good about myself, my "title", and my family.
So this morning, while I was preparing to go out to the place that I often face opposition (they're the ones who carry on about failed birth control and 3in3), I decided I wasn't going to be down-trod today. I wasn't going to take it lying down.
And I didn't.
Once the 3in3 conversation started, followed by Oceana not being PLANNED and I cut it off with,
"Oceana is our honeymoon baby, and we weren't expecting her. But she is such a blessing! And we love you! Don't we?" (Followed by silly hugs and giggled with Oceana. And there was NO reply! *YES*
And when I piped up about wanting to cloth diaper baby #3, someone started in about how it wasn't time-effective, and it wasn't hygienic AT ALL (where does this argument come from - so silly!), and how the diapers just EXPLODE, and how disposables are just so much better. So - "Mah deeyah, just get disposables, ayyye?" And I said, "No, I think I'm going to do cloth diapering. I want to."
No, 'Um, yeah... I guess", like I might have done normally. I stood up for myself. I didn't laugh it off, I didn't take other people's opinions for gold and I gotta say - I feel amazing right now.
Wish I'd learned this in high school. Life would have been easier. :)