About a month ago I decided I wanted to knit myself a sweater. I always make small projects, and I tend to have creator's ADD - in that I start projects, but if they don't finish quickly they go in a pile and never get done. So taking on an entire sweater seemed to be a bit of an optimistic idea.
On Saturday night, after convincing myself a dozen times to keep going, I finished it. And then I tried it on. And it didn't fit. We're not talking - oh, it's a little tight. We're talking, the bottom half is a reasonable size 8 and the top is a reasonable girls 8. I can't get the bustline much below my neck... so it's just not gonna be happening. I'll probably take it apart, and roll the pieces up for another project.
And when I came out of the bathroom, and threw the sweater on the couch muttering "That was a waste of time." I picked up my scarf and kept knitting on that.
Matt turned around and asked, "Why do you knit so much?"
I sat still for a few minutes and thought about. Of course I've told Blogland before that it's therapy - but I really thought about it.
On Sunday mornings at church I have (more than once) contemplated bringing my knitting with me. Of course, I don't, and every Sunday I get to noon and realize all my nails are gone, my fingers hurt, and perhaps even bleeding a bit. No joke - if I don't have anything in my hands, I bite my nails.
It's a nervous habit. More so now, than ever before.
I turned to Matt and said, "I knit because it keeps me from biting my nails. And thinking."
I wish some days I could stay in that "not thinking" zone. It's easier that way.
*My scarf's almost done*
Monday, June 9, 2008
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OMG. . .I laughed out loud at your sweater description! And I'm at WORK! I laugh only because I understand. I knitted a beautiful sweater about 5 years ago. Visually it was great. I was so excited to try it on, but when I did, I discovered the many flaws. Armholes were tight (like compromising circulation tight). The bust was like a sports bra. . it went on but it squished me flat. The neck-hole was weird. . .tight where I joined the turtle neck with the rest of the sweater and the sleeves were a little too long but passable. I was so determined to wear the darn thing that I left it on for a few hours.. . .until I realized how miserable I was and took it off so I could breathe. I still have it. No clue why. I haven't knitted a whole sweater since. I knitted a tank top though. It was much more forgiving . . .you should try it. :)
ReplyDeleteHave a great week. Keeping knitting . . . . . .and remember. . . . to talk. Keep blogging when you feel like it too. I enjoy reading it. You make me laugh. . and make me think (AAAHHH!):) and I enjoy reading about Oceana. She's beautiful. Our daughter just turned 2 last week. I LOVE this age. Everything is so new to them.
Ellen (from Ohio)
www.bjmphoto.com/blog
I'm the same way. You can guage my anxiety level by the condition of my cuticles!
ReplyDeleteI bet you're actually doing a lot of thinking. It's just with a different sort of focus. There's something about repetitive actions that helps me actually hear the voice in my head better.
Happy knitting,
becca
:) http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/ angie seems to prefer cleaning.
ReplyDeleteI understand doing needlework to keep hands busy. I do it to keep from stress eating. I also really enjoy creating pretty things. I am also ADD and if I want to watch an entire tv program I have to have something in my hands to work on. If I don't I start climbing the proverbial walls with boredom no matter how interesting the program. I bit my nails until I started high school and I don't remember how I quit, I think I started doing a lot of crocheting then. God Bless
ReplyDeleteLaurie in Washington state
Just found out my hubby is getting deployed - yep, nails are gone. Maybe I should pick up my last cross stitch project. Yep, I have creator's ADD too. Love the description! It's way too accurate!
ReplyDelete